Apotheosis of evil. I'm a baptised christian who doubts the existence of God.
An avatar of anti-socialism who doesn't fit anywhere in humanity.
I'm tired and lonely... the world is meaningless to me... I want to be forgiven for my sin against someone
very dear. Yet that someone has become a mere memory, no longer an existence in my life.
Endless lament... sorrow... because I was foolish and stubborn.
"I once tried to exploit the darkness within me. But I failed, and it backfired. I was lost in the
darkness, and couldn't find the light."
August 2004
September 2004
October 2004
November 2004
December 2004
January 2005
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June 2005
August 2005
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
December 2005
March 2006
April 2006
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July 2006
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October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
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October 2007
November 2007
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January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
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June 2008
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January 2009
February 2009
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May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
October 2009
Sigh. Can't believe I'd actually still get HER a present. Can't believe I actually believed that my friend would keep the secret for me. In a matter of a few days after I enlisted help, someone came to me and said "I've heard stories about you." Yeah, well. Thanks. Heard she's still wondering who got it for her, but ah well when she finds out she's going to burn it, mutilate it, and fling the thing out of her window. I'm rather positive that would happen.
It's finally been 556 days since she ditched me. Remembering won't change anything anymore... I... I'm feeling that I will try to like someone else to forget all that. Perhaps.. this birthday will change things for me. I doubt I can completely forget, but... everything has to begin somewhere.
How strange things tend to be. When I entered class this morning I heard this song from a classmate's laptop. There's probably no song more suitable than this for me to listen to now.
我知道伤心不能改变什么
那么让我诚实一点
诚实难免有无法控制的宣泄
只有关上了门不必理谁
一个人坐在空荡包厢里面
一个人坐在空荡包厢里面
手机让它休息一夜
难
想切歌切掉回忆的画面
眼泪不能流过十二点
谁说眼泪不能流过十二点
生日快乐
woh~生日快乐
我对自己说
蜡烛点了寂寞亮了
生日快乐泪也融了
我要谢谢你给的
你拿走的一切
还爱你带一点恨
还有时间才能平衡
热恋伤痕幻灭重生
祝我生日快乐
祝我生日快乐
还爱你带一点恨
Happie Birthday...
he yawned again at 10:10 PM